I went out last night for a few beers at Voodoo Lounge, but that’s a side story, the real story was that I decided to text Helen explaining the way I feel about her. I had to do it there and then, if I waited until the morning I wouldn’t have done it, I would have over analysed it too much! But my timing couldn’t have been worse, I asked her to go out with me to Rich’s birthday bash on Friday, so she could see how the other half lives, e.g. the sort of people and music I like as if she couldn’t accept that, it would be doomed from the outset! This morning I get a text back saying she isn’t going anywhere and that her mother had just died. I know exactly how that feels as my mother recently died as well, as well as my uncle and auntie, it’s not been a good year for me, or Helen it seems. But I felt really guilty this morning for even asking, but I obviously didn’t know about it or I wouldn’t have said anything. At least my feelings are out in the open now, although it was the worst kept secret in history. Everyone that mattered in Derrys could see that I had a soft spot for Helen, the only person that couldn’t see it was Helen herself, or maybe she just assumed that no man would find her desirable for who she is, let’s say she falls into the ‘more to love’ category; but I have always liked that sort of woman, never had much interest in stick insects myself!