Hello from Derry Avenue.

After all the worry about finding somewhere to live, I have managed to find somewhere with a little help from my dad helping me out with the deposit. I now live five minutes from work, town and my dad, so location wise it’s amazing. There was a mix up with the Internet connection, I was under the impression that the Internet connection came as part of the rental, but it isn’t the case, the guy in the room next to me had the connection installed and it’s distributed to all the rooms. Because I assumed the connection was part of the rent, I was pissed off to find that all the cables had been unplugged from the router apart from one. I thought someone in the house was playing silly buggers unplugging everyone else so they got the whole bandwidth to themselves, so I plugged everything back in again when I got home from Voodoo last night. I find out today that he unplugs it to remind everyone to pay their share. I reluctantly paid up this month, but I will be having my own connection installed next Friday (13th), and I will be upgrading my mobile phone and phone package and taking advantage of Orange’s Internet and phone package for £35 p/m. I will be able to make free calls to America through the Live Box from Orange, so it will be perfect from me, 8Mb Internet, free calls to landlines and Orange mobiles + free calls to US landlines.

I have been thinking about the Lindsey situation, I know she can never feel the same for me as I do for her, and I know that if we did get together somehow, I would always feel that she had settled for me because she couldn’t have the one she wanted. I wish that I could just move on, find someone else, but I will always compare potential girlfriends to Lindsey and that isn’t healthy for either party. How do I find myself in these messes? I love Lindsey, she loves someone else who doesn’t want her, it’s an impossible situation. I sometimes think that it would be best to make a clean break, but I miss her so much when I am not talking with her, so I don’t want to break off contact, why did I have to fall for someone in America, I can’t justify going to the US in the vain hope that it could work out, as much as my heart wants it, the logistics make it almost impossible; and it is driving me completely insane!

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