I think that the situation with the woman I have been talking to from America has gone past the point where we could just be friends. Let’s say the conversation has gone past the bounds of normal conversation between friends, (I’ll assume you all know what I mean) because I am not going to go any deeper into it than that. I know that she is scared that we have these feelings for each other after just over a week, and I am scared as well that she’ll just disappear from my life or tell me she’s in love with or found someone else. Or she’ll come over and spend the week with me then decide that she didn’t want me, both things have happened to me in the past. So my head is screaming RUN, RUN, RUN AWAY, YOU’RE ONLY GOING TO GET HURT AGAIN, but my heart wants to take the ride and try to make something of our lives. I even like the idea of taking on the father figure roll for her little boy as the real father isn’t much of a father from what I understand, playing football in the park, taking him to the beach. I have discovered a lot about myself since meeting this woman. As you can see I am not falling into the trap writing any names or anything specific about her, but I have been wondering whether to keep this blog a secret from her. I don’t think it would be healthy to let her read about all my previous feelings (however misguided) for the two other women that I have had relationships (if that’s what you can call it, online relationships are a joke) or flings (let’s face it, that’s all it was with the woman from Manchester) with. But on the flip side I want to be completely honest with her and I have told her about the recent two women in my life, but didn’t go too much into detail. I am not in love with her, far from it at this time, but I feel myself heading that way and I think she is feeling the same, so for both of us; keeping a cap on those feelings is incredibly hard!

Formula One, Fernando Alonso has cut Lewis Hamilton’s lead in the world drivers championship to just three points as Alonso finished ahead of the Englishman in a McLaren 1-2 at Ferrari’s home track Monza. Alonso led from start to finish in a dominant performance, but I was still impressed with Hamilton as he found himself behind Kimi Raikkonen’s Ferrari after the second round of pit stops as Ferrari were running a one stop strategy. But Hamilton wasn’t happy finishing behind the Ferrari, and made a do-or-die overtaking attempt at the turn one and somehow made it stick with an armful of opposite lock to control the slide and still make the apex. I don’t think Raikkonen even saw he was making the lunge up the inside until it was too late, so top marks to Lewis for that; that guy must have balls of steel, he seems to have no fear whatsoever and I like it, he’s aggressive, but fair. Kimi Raikkonen had to settle for third and now falls another two points behind Hamilton, but moves five points clear of team mate Felipe Massa after the Brazilian retired early in the race! The BMW’s had another solid race reinforcing their status of the third best team with Nick Heidfeld finishing ahead of team mate Robert Kubica, Nico Rosberg and Heikki Kovalainen finished in 6th and 7th respectively for Williams and Renault. And Jenson Button scored his second point of the season finishing in 8th, you’d think that 8th is nothing to be happy about, but for Honda this year claiming a point is like a race victory for the Japanese giant! But the sad thing is that today’s result could be academic if the FIA penalise McLaren based on the new evidence that has been presented to the WMSC. The punishment could be as severe as exclusion from this season and next season, or maybe exclusion from this season and get a points deduction before the championship even starts next season. Personally I think that if McLaren get excluded from this season, Ferrari have been handed the titles on a silver platter, and next season if McLaren are not on the grid at all, that would be detrimental to the whole sport, I won’t be watching next season if Ferrari’s only rivals are not on the grid; I don’t want to see another Ferrari whitewash season!

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